Are you doubting?

I was reading book #29 Breakout! in the Left Behind the Kid's Series, by Jenkins and LaHaye tonight and came across this quote :

"If there's one thing I know, it's that God has a purpose for things. Everything fits together like a puzzle, but we're looking at it from a human angle. All we can see is the misisng pieces. He sees the big picture and knows how it all fits."

I believe everyone in life needs to hear this and remember that the Lord really is in charge. If I learned anything in my first year of marriage it is that. God is in Control no matter how much I worry about things, God will provide and take care of the situation. I truly believe that I was living life to much in control when B lost his medical certificate back in October and The Lord knew I needed to have my eyes opened to this truth. Everything got changed, I felt like my world had fallen apart, nothing is how I thought it would be. I was losing faith in everything. Then I prayed....and I prayed hard, for a sign that the lord really was listening to me and was there for me. I prayed that prayer on a Saturday, I got my sign the very next day in church, Pastor Walter Wood gave a sermon in the Signs of Life series at our church, North Cincinnati Community Church.

The main takeaways from this sermon for me " Everything happens in the Lord's time, we are not in charge HE IS!" "If you Believe you will see the glory of God, just hang in there." Jesus is in control, he may delay things, but he is in control! There is no answer or delays sometimes to our Prayers, but as long as we believe we will see the Glory of God, eventually! "The Lord never sleeps, he is always working, and he hasn't forgotten us"

As Walter was saying these things, I had to stifle a laugh, as this was my sign that the Lord really was there, he was listening to me....I felt like a fool for losing hope but I prayed again, a prayer of Thanks to the Lord, and now I truly believe the way the last year of my life has been was so that I would lean more on the Lord, less on myself!

God is Good!

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day as enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34

The Pampered Chef

I just wanted to put a quick post out to let my readers know I've become a Pampered Chef Independent Consultant. If any one is in the Cincinnati area and is interested in having a show...let me know :)


Thanks!

In less than a year

We've gone from Future Mr and Mrs...to Mr and Mrs...to what now feels like roommates.

I don't know who this man is I'm leaving with. He isn't the sweet, caring, calm, level-headed man I married.

In October 2010 B pulled a muscle while at work on the plane. The pain from this pulled muscle caused him to pass out....for those of you who have any knowledge about the airline industry...you know this is a big UH OH!

Since Oct, we have been fighting to get his medical back. 5 doctors have told us and the FAA they believe it was just a vasovagal attack and nothing is wrong, yet they can not diagnosis this for certain. So we are grounded.

As some of my long ago readers may remember B and I did not get to go on our planned honeymoon because he got sick in the airplane as we were going to leave the states for Mexico. So we had planned on taking one in December when his next scheduled vacation was. We were going to go to Paris...the off season for travel there and would have been able to use our flight benefits. Don't ya know....you can't non-rev on other airlines while you are on sick time....therefore Paris was called off...

We were able to go to Montreal (because that is one place his airline does fly to)...just where you want to go in the middle of the winter! It was nice we were able to get away from home...but it was nothing special...snow covered with not a whole lot to do in the winter.

I was suppose to go back to MN for Christmas...but again using the rule of only being able to non-rev on his airline...that gave me one flight a day to get home...wasn't going to work out...so I missed out on Christmas! YAY....Life as a pilot's wife...sucks...

Now the new plan for B is to study for his GMAT and get his MBA.

This means our apartment has turned into basically a dorm room...he is studying all the time...and spending no time focusing on us.

We've had to ask both sets of our parents for help with our finances. EMBARRASSING!

We had plans for this summer for me to get to go down to part-time at work...but with the loss of his income and did I mention the GOOD insurance from the airlines..I have to work as many hours I can get. Which isn't a lot when Doctors are out of the office every week meaning an x-ray tech has to take a day off...and with so few of us...it seems to be my turn every few days.

My whole income will now be going to insurance and my student loan payments. Which is great since you know...we need to put a roof over our heads and food on the table. Not for our sake but for the sake of B's son A.

I'm sorry this post has been about complaining..I've run out of outlets and need to put my anger somewhere.

I hate my life. I'm sick of fighting every day with my husband...who after yesterday I've started calling roomie...because he doesn't feel like a husband...he feels like a roommate. and i don't want a male roommate! They are no fun! We snap at each other all the time...there is so much tension its like walking on egg shells every day from the moment I wake up to the final tug of the covers because...with our king size bed he seems to still not get enough covers..when I'm barely covered at all...

Any advice out there???

I pray everyday...I'm really starting to rely on my faith in the Lord...but I'm beginning to lose hope at the same time...I'm not strong enough for this...if i didn't have the Lord on my side I know i'd be a lot worse off then I am...but something has to give......

SERIOUSLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thanks for listening!

Signing Off

a.....lost and hopeless....

~*KJ*~

Edit after the comment I received:

B is not able to get Workers comp, because the injury is over. It is the passing out on the plane that is the problem. The FAA took is medical license away. Worker's Comp says that this has nothing to do with the injury and therefore will not cover anything for us!...But thanks for the thoughts!

Funny Story

I thought I would give you my fellow readers a little bit of wedding details...well not so much wedding details but the honeymoon that didn't happen details...

Mainly because there has been a lot of talk around me today of people's honeymoons..and I'm feeling sorry for myself...so where else to pout about it then on my blog...that sometimes exists!

Here we go:

My husband, (a pilot...remember this, its humorous and embarrassing for him..) got sick on our first flight from MN to TX. He asked me for the barf bag, but before I could figure out what he wanted he was projectile vomiting on the plane. So when we got to TX we had to find something new for him to wear, as he had no other clothes in his carry on. Luckily my one carry on suitcase was packed with clothes for me as I had to change as well. He seemed tired that morning as we had only 3 hours of sleep so I really didn't think that our day would turn out the way it did. As we were sitting at the airport to go to Mexico he started getting sick again, he threw up in the airport also. However then he felt amazing so we got on the plane.

As the plane was taxiing to the runway, I looked over at my husband all excited because we were going to Mexico on our HONEYMOON...and he was pale! VERY WHITE...and sorta sweaty...So I asked him what was wrong and he told me in a very soft voice he thought he was going to pass out...so I flagged down the flight attended for a cool washcloth and told her that he thought he was going to pass out... so she asked is it anxiety, does he fly much? I laughed and said yes, he is a pilot. So at this point we knew something was extremely wrong so we had to call an ambulance to meet the plane back at the gate and we spent our second day married in the emergency room in Texas..not in Mexico in our Honeymoon suite.

Turns out he was really dehydrated and had some sort of stomach bug.

So my advice to those of you with a wedding in your future...make sure you are drinking the water the whole week leading up to your wedding. We had so much going on with all the decorating and such that water was far from our minds, and that ruined our honeymoon.

We will at some point go away on a make up honeymoon...but it will not be the same...as we'll have been married for awhile and it won't be our relaxing time after our stressful week leading up to the wedding.

I know...that if this is the worst thing to happen to me then I am lucky..and I know that God stopped us from going for a reason...but I can't help but be a little bit angry that I didn't get that honeymoon I've always dreamed of...

Anyway..

Thanks for letting me vent a bit...I"m going to head to bed...One Day left of this week!!

WHOOP!!!

Signing Off

~*Mrs. KJ*~

Mrs. Regional Pilot Now!

Well its official...

I know I KNOW I've been gone forever! Wedding planning, moving and the new job took a toll on me!

The wedding went super well! Just how I wanted everything was great!

I'm sure someone had to fix something that day, but as far as I'm concerned it could not have went better.

Now we are on to living married life.

Talking about what to do with our bills, who pays what, etc.

and the latest question....

Should B apply for Emirates Airline...any thoughts on this does anyone out there know anything about them or Dubai?? Comments please!!!

Thanks,

Signing Off

~*KJ*~